Words of Wisdom
- Hell hath no fury like the lawyer of a woman scorned.
- Bills travel through the mail at twice the speed of checks.
- Hard work pays off in the future. Laziness pays off now.
- Borrow money from pessimists- they don't expect it back
- How many of you believe in telekinesis? Raise my right hand.
- Drugs may lead to nowhere, but at least it's the scenic route.
- I'd kill for a Nobel Peace Prize.
- Everybody repeat after me: "We are all individuals"
- Don't sweat petty things... or pet sweaty things.
- A clear conscience is usually the sign of a bad memory.
- Never do card tricks for the group you play poker with.
- Eagles may soar, but weasels aren't sucked into jet engines.
- No one is listening until you make a mistake.
- Success always occurs in private, and failure in full view.
- The hardness of the butter is proportional to the softness of the bread.
- The severity of the itch is proportional to the reach.
- To steal ideas from one person is plagiarism; to steal from many is research.
- If at first your don't succeed, destroy all evidence that you tried.
- A conclusion is the place where you got tired of thinking.
- Experience is something you don't get until just after you need it.